Whether you’ve been following me since the Fashionably Lo days in 2012 or are new to the blog, consider this a Get to Know Me/Refresher. I love connecting and engaging with each of you on a daily basis and thought it might be fun to share a few fun facts that you might not know from just reading a typical blog post.
Fair warning – there isn’t anything too juicy. Sorry. I wish I had more drama – or actually, I don’t. But you know what I mean. My life isn’t full of soap-opera dynamics but there are a few things might come as a surprise. Let’s dive in.
#1 I’ve only been in two relationships
The font might be tricky to read but you saw it right. Two. I’ve had two boyfriends in my 30 years of life. Well, more like two and a half but we’re not counting the half – long story better served over cocktails.
My first boyfriend was my highschool crush and we dated on and off for ten years. The relationship had its fair share of the good and the bad. A lot of firsts, a lot of memories and a lot of love. Or, well, what I thought was love. In short, it was a toxic relationship that taught me a lot about the woman I am today. I have zero regrets about the relationship and a lot of you might even remember me writing about that breakup a few years ago. At the end of the day, he was my first boyfriend and my first relationship and while it was definitely an important part of my life, I think it’s safe to say I’m in a much better place.
Which brings me to Brandon. My current main squeeze. I won’t sugarcoat it – we have our ups and downs just like any couple. But I have to say, this is what I know my love is supposed to feel like. My love for someone else and vice versa. Again, not perfect, but for the past three years, B has shown me what a real adult relationship feels like. We’ve experienced our own fair share of firsts. We’ve experienced grief. We’ve experienced new places and adventures. We’ve overcome challenges and flaws. We’ve laid in bed for three days straight without showering or leaving the house to binge out on pizza and Sons of Anarchy. Seriously, we stunk. This might not seem like much given my track record but he’s definitely my favorite boyfriend ever and I like to think he’s 100% made me a better girlfriend. I’ve learned a lot about the things I won’t put up with, the things I personally need to work on, the way I handle conflict and communication, the way I handle passion and intimacy. Just everything.
#2 I cry a LOT
Like, a lot. Like, a few times a week. I’m an emotional, sensitive person. I embrace the tears and always have. I used to think this made me weak. I used to let people put me down because I chose to be vulnerable at times that didn’t really seem like the best time to be crying. I’m here to tell you – being vulnerable is a sign of strength. All of those tears, to me, they’re worth it. To let out the pain and frustration, sadness, joy, passion. It takes a lot to let down those walls in front of strangers let alone people you share your life with.
I won’t ever apologize for crying or being emotional but I am trying to work on not letting the emotion and sensitivity get in the way of certain things. It isn’t always ideal to uncontrollably sob when you’re in an argument with your boyfriend. Sometimes a crying fit doesn’t solve stress about money problems. But at the end of the day – I love the sensitive side of me because it makes me more compassionate when the people around me are struggling. It makes me love hard, empathize even harder and empower others to be vulnerable.
#3 I Overcame an Eating Disorder
I always struggle with talking about this because I never know how to really approach it. It feels a little awkward to be honest but in the spirit of being candid, here we go.
I developed an eating disorder towards the end of college as means to cope with a few things. A lack of control in my relationship. An unrealistic view of my own body. A completely unhealthy relationship with comparison and body image. I limited calories to 600/day. I threw up after I ate. I binged on whole pizzas and boxes of cereal or limited my lunch to 100 calorie packs of popcorn. Over the course of two years, I dropped to my lowest weight of 97 pounds. To be clear, I am 5’5. My body isn’t meant to be 97 pounds and be healthy.
I tried my best to blame the weight-loss on everything from a tape worm to being stressed with college/finding a new job. I worked a lot so I used that as an excuse. I hid it from family and friends and denied, denied, denied. And then someone stepped in. A few people stepped in. I won’t go into details but I spent a year getting help and learning how to cope with those feelings that initiated the disorder in the first place. I won’t lie – I wasn’t cured overnight. It took me years to fully develop a better relationship with body image. Sometimes I still get triggered but my fitness journey over the past year has played a huge role in not only helping me appreciate my curves but also helped me understand and develop a better relationship with food.
While this has typically been a pretty private part of my life, I think it’s so important to acknowledge the difficult times in our lives and assess the progress we’ve made and the person it’s made us.
The purpose of this post is simple. I want to connect with you. I want to relate to you. I want you to relate to me. We all have so many things that set us apart and bring us together but at the end of the day, the more transparent I can be with all of you, the more I think we can truly connect. Thank you so much for being a part of my journey!