Poll time: How many of you have scrolled through Instagram, stumbled across that seemingly perfect couple in adorable coordinating pjs or caught in the act of a seemingly natural “candid” moment and thought, #goals. (*raises hand…twice*) Let’s be real. We’ve all been there. Whether it’s on social media or in one of our favorite movies (I’m looking at you Ryan & Rachel), we all have that moment of comparison or self doubt, wondering ‘Why can’t that be me? Why can’t my bf be more like him? What am I doing that is keeping me from being #goals?’
Now let’s be really real. No seriously, are you ready?
Perfect does not equal REAL.
Woah. I know. Crazy. But seriously, why strive for perfect when you can have something real?
I am SO excited to be teaming up with fellow blogger babes Sabrina & Mae for a brand new lifestyle series: #REALationshipGoals. And no, this will not be a series where we talk about how amazing our relationships are. Instead, we want to share and celebrate all of the real moments that make our relationships what they are: crazy/great/beautiful/challenging/fun/hectic/silly/emotional. Honestly, the list goes on.
We are all at different stages in our relationships. From dating to newlyweds to a 5 yr marriage…we cover a lot of bases and have a lot to share. We hope to use this series to talk about the issues, the good & the bad, answer questions, dish out secrets and just have fun! Oh, and by the way, we are in NO way relationship experts. We just want to share the perspective of three very real relationships at three very different journeys in life.
You can expect topics like finances, romance, work + balance, dating, sex (pg-13 obvi), insta husbands and more. The best part? We really really want to hear from you. What do want to know? What tips or advice do you have? What are the most challenging things in your relationship? We plan to dish it all.
Get all of the details on us, our baes and what we’re most excited about below and stay tuned every other Friday for a special installment of #REALationshipGoals on the blog!
Lauren: Dating #FashionablyBae aka the Pokemon Go King.
Mae: Married to my best, Nick.
Sabrina: Happily married to my high school sweetheart, Sahir.
How did you meet?
Lauren: B and I met in 8th grade through mutual family friends. Long story short: his family became besties with my cousin’s family in PA. His family moved to ATL and because quick besties with my family.
Mae: Nick and I actually met when we were kids. We were both homeschooled and we would see each other at events and occasionally play together. He admittedly remembers me a little more than I remember him. We are from a pretty small town and for the next several years, we would see each other here and there at different social functions. We didn’t interact one-on-one much during those years, but Nick remembers me as “the girl with the big eyes.” Fast forward a few years and we were in the same youth group at church. When I was 15, we quickly became friends and started dating later that same year. The rest is history, as one would say! (but there are some really great stories there, too)
Sabrina: Oh geez, Sahir and I are still trying to figure this out. We think that we met at our church when we were 7 or 8 years old. Regardless, we have been friends pretty much our entire lives. We became close friends when we took an SAT prep course together in 7th grade. –No, that is not a typo, really, 7th grade. Our parents, along with 5 other kids’ parents, decided they wanted their children to get ahead of the game and hired a private tutor to prep us every on Sunday mornings. I’m pretty sure I nicknamed him ‘floaty’ since he wore a big navy blue sweatshirt with a yellow fish on it. (Note: I have since worked on his fashion sense, and we are good to go now.)
How long have u been together?
Lauren: So…longer story. We had crushes on eachother back in high school but who at that age actually acts on them? Not us that’s for sure. Skip past weekend trips to the lake with both of our #squads and the best kiss of my life after his graduation pool party and fast forward to us attempting a short romance. Really fast forward to the part where I was an idiot and didn’t appreciate the Bae that would soon become Fashionably Bae and skip wayyyy ahead to the beginning of last year (2015) when we were both coming out of serious relationships. That’s where our journey really began. As dramatic as all of that sounds…I wouldn’t have it any other way. We jumped right back into the swing of things and have been going strong ever since.
Mae: We’ve been together for 10 years and married for 5. In that time together, we’ve experienced my high school graduation, our college graduation, living in 3 states, several jobs, traveling to 6+ countries (sometimes apart), lots of concerts, and countless memories. Through lots of change and adventure, we can always count on one another to be our constant (even when we, ourselves, change).
Sabrina: We’ve been together for 10 years and married for 1 (this month!) Every single year with Sahir has been an adventure. I remember my friends telling me that high school relationships wouldn’t last through college and that people grow apart. This is true… but sometimes, they grow together. Sahir and I are not the same people we were 10 years ago – we’re better. We have become better versions of ourselves with the help of the other.
What’s the most challenging thing about your relationship?
Lauren: That we love each other too much. Ha just kidding! In the spirit of total candidness…I’d have to say communication. I’m a talker and love to talk through things. Like everything. On the flip side, I tend to not listen very well. And like most guys, Brandon doesn’t love 3am conversations about something that “just won’t stop bothering me”. It’s something we’re working on but can definitely be challenging at times for both of us.
Mae: Hands down, Nick leaving the dryer door open every time he opens it. Those things have doors for a reason! I’m joking, of course, but that’s definitely something I give Nick a hard time about daily.
In reality, I’m tempted to say communication here because every disagreement is rooted in some sort communication issue. That being said, Nick and I communicate really well but have found a sort of unique challenge in learning to work together. Nick and I work together a lot for Mae Amor and, while we both love it, we’ve almost had to learn how to compartmentalize our relationship. He never stops being the guy I love and adore, but sometimes we have to just be in “work mode.” It’s been a really fun challenge, but it’s definitely something we’ve had to figure out.
Sabrina:I just like don’t get it. The hamper is right there. You play basketball, how do you miss it – every time! JK .. uh, kinda.
Really though, Sahir and I are incredibly blessed with so many opportunities. One of them is that we both have demanding careers that take us away from home. Sahir owns his own company and therefore he works ridiculous hours. He is so good about not bringing his work home with him, but sometimes that means that he isn’t home till late or has to go in on the weekends. Vacations – don’t even think about it. I know that this is his dream and he wants to travel and spend time at home as much as I want him home, but this is our reality. It is a blessing that business is doing well so this is nothing to complain about. In short, he works a lot and I miss him.
Why do you wanna be part of this series?
Lauren: I think I’m most looking forward to celebrating all of the real moments in our relationships. The great, the bad, the weird, the funny, the uber romantic…all things that we all deal with.
Mae: Well, why wouldn’t I? I love anything that has anything to do with Fashionably Lo and Simply Sabrina. Beyond that, though, I think this is a really great exercise in looking into our relationships. Sometimes people compliment Nick and I as if we have something figured out. People ask me relationship advice often and I never know what to say. I’m so flattered by this, but the truth is we are just regular people. We’re crazy about one other, but we fight like children some days. Sometimes people use language that we have a perfect relationship or that we are “relationship goals.” That’s what sort of led us to the idea of REALationship goals. Maybe we look like we live a charmed life on the outside, but we are all real people and we all go through a lot of the same real things as other couples. The goal for this series is not to be an advice or how-to column. It’s a chance for people to have a peek into real relationships. We hope the series will be honest and relatable, while still encouraging readers in their own relationships.
Sabrina: I love my man, but I live for girltalk. The idea for this series came out of a candid conversation about relationships and how we each deal with things differently. I learned so much from that talk that I knew that I wanted to keep the conversation going. None of us are experts, we are all just trying to figure it out ourselves. Relationships & marriage are hard. You have to work at it, and sometimes you just need to get real with your girlfriends because they are the ones who will tell it like it is (read: “No Sabrina, you were being irrational. It is not okay to get mad that he watched the season finale of Dancing With The Stars without you”)