Dealing with Comparison

Comparison. What a bitch.

That feeling of “why can’t I look like her”, or, “I wish my life was like that”.  And that isn’t even the half of it.

We’ve all felt it. Whether it’s while perusing through your IG feed or seeing that “it” girl in real life, we’ve all compared ourselves to someone else. Sure, some ladies rock that killer confidence and maybe they don’t compare. But I’ll be the first to admit, I do it. And I do it WELL.

If I had to point out one thing I hate about being a blogger – it’s the comparison. The feeling that I have to look a certain way, act a certain way, style my house a certain way, talk a certain way, blah blah blah blah blah.

I feel pretty confident (in general) but it is so hard to stop comparing myself to other women. Their perfectly decorated living rooms, their adorable husbands, their chic AF closets, their toned bods, their epic vacations. How are you supposed to see that on a daily basis and not feel like a total loser. I wish I could say that I don’t let it get me down, but it does. I have totally unfollowed someone because of the negativity flooding my mind every time I saw her posts. It feels so pathetic to type it – but it’s true.

Now before you say it – I know – what we see on the gram is not even half of the real story. I know, I know, I know. Instagram is a highlight reel. I know what goes on behind the screen isn’t always picture perfect. But let’s be real – how many times do you actually remind yourself of that? For me, it’s not so often.

That is, until now.

I know I’m not alone here. Whether you’re a blogger or not, social media and just life, in general, is full of these moments of comparison. We compare ourselves to celebrities, bloggers, friends, strangers, etc. Maybe we feel inadequate, maybe we feel like we aren’t doing something as best as we could, maybe we feel like the need to be something that we’re not because what she is looks SO cool. But, it doesn’t have to always be this way.

I recently made a declaration that for every time I negatively compare myself to someone else, I’m going to also quickly say something positive to myself about ME. I know, corny. But it helps I swear. If I see a girl traveling to this gorgeous place every single day and wonder to myself why I can’t be that lucky I then force myself to turn it around and acknowledge the fact that I have been to so many amazing places that were important to me and that is special enough. It doesn’t always work, but I’m trying.

I will be the last person to say it’s easy to stop comparison as a whole. But what I am trying to do is to not let the comparison suck the spirit out of me. Instead, I wanted to use that to fuel appreciation for the things I do have and the things I want to accomplish. If I’m feeling inspired by those IG-worthy travels, then even better!

At the end of the day, I have to be the one to focus the positive on myself and make it a priority to shower myself in self-love. If you have to unfollow someone because they trigger a negative feeling (for now), then do it. The goal is to get the point of seeing these picture-perfect lives and celebrating what this means for the other person or even using that moment as inspiration for a dream or goal of your own.

Let’s work on it and touch base in a few months. But believe me ladies, we can do it!



  1. 9.11.18
    Tabitha said:

    Great post and message! Comparison is all too real and explains why it’s often called the thief of joy. It doesn’t help either when you try to do you, even if it’s different, and you see society only bless those who fit the perfect mold, which makes the comparison even worse. I love your little trick to combat this and will definitely try this myself! I love and appreciate these honest messages!


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